Stories of Kindness from Around the World

I'm an American who has lived in France for nearly 20 years.   I've whined and complained with other Americans about how the French are unfriendly, cold, reserved, unavailable for friendship.  I've had a hard time making a living here as a psychotherapist and healer and periodically blamed this also on the French.

I live in Versailles and for the past 4 years the city has sponsored events for International Women's Day.  Three years ago, I moved to a new neighborhood and felt an intense need to meet people so I went to the cinema night for women's day featuring the film with Charlize Theron called "North Country," a film about the first class action suite against sexual harrasement.   I was excited about the possibility of finding a way to connect to French women through the discussion we would have after the film, perhaps to make friends, perhaps to get more work. 

Outside the cinema was a woman with long gray hair who had a slightly strong smell and was asking for money.  I reached for my wallet to give her a Euro and then something made me stop and enter into conversation with her.  I said, "Look, all the women going to the cinema here on a Tuesday night are seeing a film that could transform your life.  I'd rather buy you a ticket than give you money."  She responded, "Are you rich?"  I said, "No, but there is a group rate for women who signed up in advance and I'll ask if I can pay that price for you." 

So she came in behind me, hiding behind me because as she said the people running the theater didn't like her.  I got her a ticket and she sat next to me in the cinema.  There were 80 women there; I noticed that some of the women who worked for the city of Versailles were turning around and looking at me with expresssions of surprise and curiosity. 

I encouraged the woman I had bought the ticket for to come the following night to an event where there would be many representatives of various social services that could be of help to her.  She came and I was able to direct her to an agency that helped women in her situation.  At the same time, a woman who worked for the city came toward me and said, "Are you the person who bought a ticket for the woman outside the theater asking for handouts?"  When I said yes she said, "I want you to come to the community center where I work.  I want the other employees there to meet you." 

This was the beginning of a deep friendship and colleague relationship; I now have a temporary job with the city this year as the coordinator of women's week with my colleague and I have chosen the theme of "Women and Money."   I've met some fantastic, dynamic French women and have more work than I've ever had in my 20 years in France.

And the woman I took to the cinema that night?  I learned that she's not homeless and she was a secretary and she speaks English.  I don't know much else about her situation, financial or otherwise.  I do know that she still feels the need to ask for money in the street even though there may be other help available to her.  And I do know that she called me her angel the night I paid for her ticket and sat with her. 

For me, though, she's more than my angel, she's part of the Mother of Us All.  Through reaching out to her I made a great friend in my colleague, have a great job, and released a lot of judgments about the French.  I don't have a lot of money but I'm doing better than I was 3 years ago and I feel infinitely richer.  All thanks to the woman whose life I wanted to transform.

--An American in Versailles