I looked after a friend for what I thought would be a few weeks, but turned into 12 years. She was normal, whatever that is, when I began to look after her following a stroke, but as time went by I began to notice more and more problems.
I learned that to rush her if we were late for tea was futile. She had to go through the proce
ss of putting on her lipstick, turning out the light, looking around the room and shutting the door. If I tried to help by turning out the light or closing the door, her routine was broken and we would be lucky if we ever got that cup of tea.
Sometimes I would tease her by putting out the light and then turning it back on. Eventually, she would laugh at something that at one time would have send her into a spiral of chaos.
I learned patience from her. I learned she was a remarkable woman. By the time she died, she knew she was loved, she was funny, a great listener, caring and available to anyone who might need her ear.
I learned that to rush her if we were late for tea was futile. She had to go through the proce
ss of putting on her lipstick, turning out the light, looking around the room and shutting the door. If I tried to help by turning out the light or closing the door, her routine was broken and we would be lucky if we ever got that cup of tea.Sometimes I would tease her by putting out the light and then turning it back on. Eventually, she would laugh at something that at one time would have send her into a spiral of chaos.
I learned patience from her. I learned she was a remarkable woman. By the time she died, she knew she was loved, she was funny, a great listener, caring and available to anyone who might need her ear.
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- Posted by pluto178
- Dec 25, 2020
- Comments (10)
Readers Comments
icetea wrote: Patience, compassion and tea, i believe this is a perfect cocktail.
balou wrote: A wonderful story, pluto, thank you for being such a good friend!
. And what is normal? We all have our quirks and who decides if this or that quirk is 'normal' or not? Quirks make us into unique human beings. Thank you for accepting her uniqueness and for challenging her in a friend-ly way to laugh about herself.
. And what is normal? We all have our quirks and who decides if this or that quirk is 'normal' or not? Quirks make us into unique human beings. Thank you for accepting her uniqueness and for challenging her in a friend-ly way to laugh about herself.
melnotes wrote: Wonderful story of love and dedication :) Thank you.
pluto178 wrote: I love the idea of being that ill and still wanting to put my lippy on even if it is just to wipe it off on the cup. Its a sign your not ready to give up just yet. Have to go I think someones at the door I didn't hear a bell but just in case. lol x
mindyjourney wrote: So lovely, you are dear pluto :)). Many thanks for caring for friend, what lessons you learned! Defects? Perhaps not, my friend, only differences. Love this share much. Brings me happy tears. Blessings.
mish wrote: (((((((((PLUTO))))))))))
jia wrote: nice share.. heartmelting story pluto.. :-))
pluto178 wrote: My friend and I came up with the name the Defectives.....its a play on The Detectives..........it is meant with kindness for all our differences......only playfully though never with cruelty. x
DotMatrix wrote: You were a good friend to her. Your love no doubt gave her strength and a lot of comfort. This is in sync with a story I read yesterday by James Altucher and tweeted about a father's love, daughter's courage and the perfect come back: "There's nothing wrong with me."
pluto178 wrote: Thanks DotMatrix I so love that name with my interest in Nine Star Ki but I digress.....I watched a heavily autistic child on TV and someone said just because he's not normal it doesn't mean you should be mean to him. The reply came back he is normal..... we are all normal it's just different for each and every one of us but we are all normal. In fact with his levels of intelligence to say he's not normal is to say he is more intelligent than you are and so that can't be right. The more we see each of us has a defect area that is not as strong as another the less judgemental we need to be. For example if you are the Chairman of a huge company you are less likely to be the perfect parent, not always but likely........some careers can affect family life. Life is all about the opposites that we tend to ignore. So "Theres nothing wrong with me" is the perfect comeback if someone makes derogatory comments about you. Love yourself and you will find it stops happening. I love you all as you are a reflection of me. x
