Stories of Kindness from Around the World

A Kindness Chain Made of Roses


--by duchess, posted May 12, 2011

I love this forum but I'm hesitant to post about my own "good works" as it sounds like I'm blowing my own horn.  I think that helping others should be a true gift from the heart rather than something that you receive applause for in a public forum.

This said, I would like to share my story, not because I want to be thought well of by others but rather because I have discovered a recipe for happiness that I'm sure someone can benefit from.

So here it is.

It is hard for me to keep a smile on my face during certain times of the year and this is one of them. With the impending arrival of Valentine's Day I found myself thinking that if I didn't make a concerted effort to put myself in a good humor I would very quickly find myself sliding into depression.

You see, I haven't received chocolates, cards, flowers or tokens of love since 1999 when my husband was killed in a car accident. He always brought me flowers for Valentine's Day (and birthdays, and special occasions, and some days for no reason at all) and it's hard for me to see all of the advertising and reminders of the love that now only exists in my memories.

Anyway, yesterday was my day to run my weekly shopping errands, and I had noted that the grocery store had even gotten into the Valentine's Day Retail hype and was offering a dozen roses on sale for $12.00. So I bought a bouquet, knowing that my husband would want me to have them.  I hoped that they would lift my spirits, although I truly just felt depressed at the idea of buying flowers for myself. 

In Canadian retail establishments, stores do their part to encourage people to use recyclable totes rather than non-biodegradable plastic bags and most stores charge 5¢ per plastic bag.

While I was bagging up my groceries I noticed that the man bagging his groceries opposite me had purchased a large quantity of plastic bags rather than bringing recyclable totes.

I always bring extra totes so I figured that I would brighten up his day by performing a random act of kindness and helping the ecology at the same time by passing one along, and said: "hey dude, save a tree…  you can have one of my bags".  He just growled "that's not necessary" at me.  I persisted by saying: "really, there's no strings attached, I don't want anything from you, I have extra and I'd be happy to give you one". I received another monosyllabic and emphatically grunted "NO" in response.

Rather than let this unpleasant individual put a damper on the good mood that I had worked so hard to cultivate, as I left, I smilingly wished him "a better day" (and got growled at again for my efforts) and went on to run the rest of my errands.

As I was driving to my next errand it occurred to me that other people might also be having a tough time, so as I went from store to store and met up with all of the sales people who regularly serve me, I pulled out a rose and wished them a Happy Advance Valentine's Day.

The lady at the cosmetic counter practically jumped across the counter to hug me.

The really overworked pharmacist who hardly ever smiles was so staggered by this simple gift that she had tears in her eyes and her smile practically lit up the entire back of the store.

All too soon my roses were gone, but then it occurred to me that somewhere along the line I had ceased having to force my good mood.  By simply bringing a little sunshine into people's lives I brought joy into my own.

As children we have all been taught that it's better to give than to receive, but exposure to the unkindnesses of the world wears on us as we grow up. Consequently by the time we reach adulthood we have lost so much faith in our fellow man and even in ourselves that the childhood lessons are forgotten.   It didn't surprise me that the unpleasant man at the grocery store refused my offer as modern society has taught us to be distrustful, and offers of assistance and even smiles are treated as suspect.

However, it shouldn't stop us from trying.  We won't always succeed, but the successes DO outweigh the failures, and through the gift of a smile, a kind word or a flower, with any luck we will cause a chain reaction of happiness, tolerance and renewed faith.
 

 

4876 Reads

Readers Comments

smileswithhope wrote: This is a really inspiring story. "By simply bringing a little sunshine into people's lives I brought joy into my own." So true. Thank you for sharing.
Brian Zhang wrote: You are a great lady. Wish you peace and happiness. Thanks for your sharing.
couellet wrote: Beautiful!
erinvictoria wrote: What a great story. Helping others is the best medicine to make yourself feel better. I'm sure your husband had a big smile on his face while he watched you. It's july, but happy valentine's day! I'll never forget this story.
moral12 wrote: It was thoughtful of you to give to others. Good karma to you!
Spoonerism wrote: Hi duchess, i think we all worry that we might be sharing a story for the wrong reasons. But in the end, especially on here, knowing that the story could inspire another 20, 40 even 1000 other stories in the future is all we need to send in that post. I couldn't agree more about valentine's day being all hyped up (peapod and i celebrate a random saints day instead)but i'm glad you found a way to banish that feeling of gloom and spread some joy at the same time! I love the giving out flowers stories, especially since you can brighten so many people's days! :-) thanks for sharing.
thebigkind wrote: Thanks for sharing your story. If you had kept this to yourself, people like me on the other side of the world wouldn't have had a chance to share it and be inspired by it. I used to think similarly to you in that acts of kindness should be a quiet affair, but i have since developed another view. It is our true nature to be kind and generous. Why should we "hide" that part of us? In hiding it we deprive ourselves of the pleasure that comes with sharing it, and the pleasure and inspiration it provides for others. Even though there is a place for annonymous random acts, there is a much greater place for openess and celebration. This site is an amazing example of this, if everyone thought this way there would be no stories to read, to be inspired by, to be reminded of how wonderful people really can be, to have faith restored in a world where much of the news is "bad". People's stories amaze me, and cheer me on, they bring out my soft side and have helped me develop more compassion. I loved your story. Keep sharing and shining your light. Stories like yours brighten my day, and i'm sure many others. Love and blessings to you.
Paula Kiger wrote: Thank you for sharing that. Blessings to you.
companion wrote: What a lovely person you are. Made me think more about others and less about me. You are awesome duchess/lady. Xxoo
rainbowSmiles wrote: This was such a b'ful story, i loved it! Truly the only way to overcome our own loneliness and distress is to make others happy even for a moment :)
Wish you are able to leave message of love to others every single valentine in memory of your husband.

Regards, love, smiles :)

Add A Comment