Sent on a Mission of Kindness
--by raqui, posted Mar 19, 2007
I am in a relationship that has had some hard times. I don't even know if we will make it. We both love each other but it seems that everything is going wrong.
I tried to have a nice weekend with him only to end up a disaster. Today we had a big fight and I didn't know what to do.
I know he wanted to get away from me. Even when he says he didn't. I was so depressed and sad, when I looked through my mail. And there they were -- SMILE CARDS.
Reluctantly I took out 5 smile cards and gave them to my man. I told him go out and use these. "Do 5 things for 5 people." He looks at me and asks where I got these from. "No questions right now. I know you don't want to be around me right now so go out do 5 nice things for someone. Maybe we will both feel better."
"What do I do?" he asked me. I said, "Anything. Anything nice. Pay for someones train fair, go to a store and help someone pay for something, help someone who needs it. Then give them the card. You can't say anything or let them know who you are. Just do it and walk away after you give them the card."
He accepted them, took a closer look, and then left. I spent a good half hour crying. I didnt know what to do ... so I send him on a mission of kindness. Bringing some kindness in our relationship will help us, I think.
i think when we turn the focus in the relationship from our SELF to the other person ,then good things start to happen.
but its so cool that even at moments like that you thought of kindness!
Hope that gift of smile cards have cast a magic spell.
I collect little poems and quotes from various books and I came across this one:
When you feel your lifes in confusion,
When your steps seem to slither and slide,
When each road seems to lead to disaster,
Remember - you do have a Guide.
When you feel sad and forsaken,
When you're fearful of terrors unknown,
When you're lost in a land full of strangers,
Remember - you're never alone.
When your world seems o'ershadowed by sorrow,
When you're hurt, or cast down in despair,
Remember - there's Someone who loves you,
Who will keep you throughout in His care.
Remember we are with you all the way and you are in our thoughts.
Keep smiling through.
I have found that everytime I have come up against a wall in a relationship, a friendship or with family and if I cannot move past that wall, it is a point in my life when if feel that I am being shown something. Whenever I hit a wall like this which is frustrating or painful or something that triggers a lot of anger, I see it as a lesson being presented to me. It is usually an opportunity for change...I either have to change something within my own self...something in my own own behaviour or attitude towards another person or a situation, or I need to create a change in the situation itself.
The step I take is to acceptance. I accept the situation as it is in the present moment. Total acceptance of the situation. Sometimes this can be a painful processs.
Then I take responsibility for my own attitude in creating the situation and I see the situation exactly as it is, with a clear vision of the role I have played in creating it. I try not to blame others or myself.
At this point I ask myself what it is about my own self and my own behaviour that I can learn from. What can I change? How can I grow through this situation?
Then I try to bring in that change in my own ways and attitude. But the change has to come from within...from the heart.
Sometimes situations ae not so straight forward.
Sometimes I have to just change the situation. But I take away a lesson from the situation through whichI can grow as a person.
I don't know if this helps you in this situation...but it is a formula that works for me.
I try to see everything in life as an opportunity to go deeper within, as an opportunity for growth and as a lesson from the divine. The lesson can be learnt when you choose to turn every negative situation as an opportunity to turn it into a positive situation, by taking steps to make that possible.
I wish you all the best and I send you my support.