Stories of Kindness from Around the World

I Hope I Never Forget To Give Without Being Asked


--by sue5, posted Feb 20, 2015
It's hard to ask for help. It's uncomfortable to admit that you need something or that your life would be a lot easier if you could lean on someone else to do a little thing that you always assumed as your responsibility.

I've learned that people won't ask for help, but they sure will appreciate it if you jump in and do something helpful. Before you jump in, however, you have to really understand their circumstance and figure out what act or deed would be most helpful.

Out of habit, we often bring casseroles to the sick. Sure it is helpful, but they get too many and their kids don't like what they get so they have to make something else anyway.

So, instead I try to fill in where others aren't - doing laundry, picking up kids from school, including kids in activities etc. I hope I never forget that silence does not mean someone is ok, it just might mean that they don't want to ask for help.
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Readers Comments

Amy wrote: Oh so true. I don't drive due to a suspended driver's license. I also live in a town with limited public transportation. I didn't "like" asking for rides, but eventually got comfortable doing so. Anyway i got comfortable with it until the "people shouldn't be obligated to give you a ride" (ironically the person who said that to me was only ever asked for a ride once, the other times they gave me a ride they asked me if i would like a ride), and "i'm not a taxi driver" (again by someone who had only given me a ride once or twice and the comment was supposidly not directed to or about me, but at the same time was made in my presence while they were giving me a ride- one they'd offered to give).

I decided there were enough people who knew i didn't drive. Some knew why, others didn't but did know my not diving was a regular thing, not just temporary due to car break down or something like that. All had a way of contacting me. I decided i wouldn't ask anymore. I waited to see if any offered a ride. They all let me walk. In icy cold weather, late at night, in 107 degree heat, in the midst of hazardous air quality warnings due to wild fires.

I was very hurt, but at the same time it has caused me to be determined that once i'm able to drive again, if i know of someone who needs a ride, i'll be offering. Same with other needs i'm aware of. It stinks to know people are aware of a need but just turn a blind eye (and pray they're not directly asked).
Geranium wrote: I love the kindness you are spreading. (((hug)))
sandyremillar wrote: Very sweet and kind of you. I also consider the other person's taste, it's wise to do so. Bless you!
Michele Purcell wrote: Good for you. It is so true for people to ask for help is very hard. And for you to do those kind, helpful things without them asking is very nurturing for them. And i am sure they remember it and probably does it themselves. So you are passing it along.
Mish wrote: So true. Blessed be.

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