For some months now, I've been purposely choosing the longest lines to stand in -- supermarket, movies, cash register at stores during holidays so as to "develop" patience. Then, if someone looks stressed, like a mom with kids or something, I give my place away and move back to the line or longest line.
What goes on is my mind races. I start blaming -- clerk for not being faster or organization for not having more checkers, or the lady with the coupons, the man who's visa card isn't accepted. I judge the people in front of me. I notice what a rush I'm in and question why I'm doing this. My monkey mind starts to consume me, racing with endless stream of such thoughts.
I often fail to do this process, just getting carried away by my todo list and my internal stress or "forgetting" to do it. But sometimes I learn -- my mind pauses a bit, I feel the presence of those in the line near me, I breathe a little longer. I observe my inner workings and how that affects my outward behavior. And perhaps in some subtle ways, this process may serve others too.
It's a random act of patience, you could call it.
What goes on is my mind races. I start blaming -- clerk for not being faster or organization for not having more checkers, or the lady with the coupons, the man who's visa card isn't accepted. I judge the people in front of me. I notice what a rush I'm in and question why I'm doing this. My monkey mind starts to consume me, racing with endless stream of such thoughts.
I often fail to do this process, just getting carried away by my todo list and my internal stress or "forgetting" to do it. But sometimes I learn -- my mind pauses a bit, I feel the presence of those in the line near me, I breathe a little longer. I observe my inner workings and how that affects my outward behavior. And perhaps in some subtle ways, this process may serve others too.It's a random act of patience, you could call it.
15.3K Reads
- Posted by Tenzin
- Dec 31, 2008
- Comments (43)
Readers Comments
anguyen wrote: Tenzin, thank you for reminding me of the need for patience. I feel that here in Southern California all we do is rush. We forget to see people, we are consumed with our own need to be number 1. It is beneficial to stand in line and to reflect on those around you. Each has a story, each has their struggles and successes, and we so often forget them because of our own self absorption. We have to be put out, inconvienced, forced to wait in line. Thank you again for reminding me of the need to practice patience. I will start now.
lOVEBUG wrote: what a honest assesment of how your mind works, mine works the same way to be honest.Thanks for the reminder
EePee wrote: THANKS SO MUCH for sharing something that I think we all have to be constantly aware of: patience, consideration, courtesy; afterall what goes round comes round.
I wish you & yours the best.
E
I wish you & yours the best.
E
Aurelia wrote: Good for you for realizing your downfault. I too am pressed for time and that's when the person in front of me on line always has an item ring out wrong or is slow as molasses. You are right. I have to look away, take a deep breath, and see if there's something else happening around me to ease my tension. Patience,is something we much practice. ~Aurelia
katlampi wrote: This would make an interesting New Years Resolution. It happens to be one of my downfalls too. I'm an impatient driver, an impatient shopper, impatient with lines, and impatient when appointments run late, etc. I am sure you turn people's days around when you let them cut in front :)
mitu915 wrote: that's such a great introspective 'helpothers' thought. thank you for that tip on cultivating patience. i just might try it out! Happy New Year! :)
perseverance wrote: You are right.When we want to stand in the queue,we want it to move fast.When we are waiting for public transport,we want the first bus to be ours.When I am driving I want others to give way.When some body cuts in I swear.It is the order of the way we have become addicted to looking at the watches only.Thanks for your post to remind myself that I shoulsd learn patience
Rosemary wrote: Thank you for sharing this inspiring story, i too am very impatient at times and i can only learn once again the art of being patient! thanks for the reminder!!! A Happy New Year to all
Rosebud
Rosebud
dana wrote: Holiday season '06, before I became a Buddhist, I observed the tradition of Advent--four Sundays before Christmas, lighting candles, saying prayers. Because I was trying to become more patient, I decided that I would get in the longest line in every store I shopped in for that whole month--then let the person behind me go ahead of me when it was my turn at the checkout. Some people were so shocked they actually got "angry" with me... and said nothing, walking away in a huff when they we done at the register...others were delighted and curious, and said they would start doing the same thing. Most thanked me and wished me well. It was one of the most interesting social experiments I've conducted. What I've learned is that many people just aren't used to being treated kindly--by anyone--and that has inspired me to--as we say in Zen's Four Boundless Vows--put endless suffering to rest, whenever I can.
Ekblom wrote: Great idea!
The development of patience and tolerance are excellent things to cultivate. I'm going to try your idea Tenzin, we all could all use a little more patience!
The development of patience and tolerance are excellent things to cultivate. I'm going to try your idea Tenzin, we all could all use a little more patience!
