My Hour On the Streets of New York

--by Adam, posted Jan 30, 2008

On Nov 11 of 2006, I made a deal with myself that I would give $1 to every homeless person who asked. Call it a moment of clarity or whatever, but I woke up from a rough night of partying in Vegas and just felt like this model of taking wasn't working for me anymore.

Still, to be honest, I embarked on this experiment thinking that I would just bleed money, that there would be 20 or so homeless people a day coming up to me in NYC and that I would run out of money soon.
This never happened.

When I returned to NY, it took 8 days before I walked past a homeless person who asked me for some spare change. And by that time I had seen the folly of my own mind and was more than happy to part with a measly dollar. It wasn't about the money, though. In fact, it was never about the money. It was me and my mind getting comfortable with giving and giving from a place of not having a lot of resources (as a budding actor). Still, I have more than they and it felt so good. I continue to do this experiment today.

Fast forward to last week. Just returning from a 10 day meditation retreat, I had a more intense awareness of this little experiment.   As my friend would say, "How could I step it up?!?"

Here's what happened.

On my way to my NYU grad acting audition, I ran across two homeless persons -- a woman named Francine and a man named Barret. I told Francine I'd be right back because I had to tell a friend where I was; and I gave Barret $1. When I came back Francine was in tears. After a big hug, she went on to tell me that nobody listened to her. Nobody looked at her, people just walked right by her and didn't even acknowledge that she was alive. My heart broke. We hugged on the street for a few seconds and then I asked her if she'd like something to eat. She said yes, and we went into the local McDonalds.   Through her sobs and laughs, we ordered her a #6 fish meal (supersized of course!) ... I gave her a $20, told her I had to run and said I'd see her soon. I left feeling helpless.

The next day, when I walked past Barret I gave him a dollar again. To give you a visual, Barret is in his late 30's and is a cross between a guru and John Lennon. A completely free spirit, as far as I can tell. He's reading books about psychology and physics and always tells me about his platonic girlfriends that he has that come around to him for conversation.

I don't even know why I did it, but I just sat down to be with him. I had "be the change" ringing in my head. So what did I want to see more of in the world? I want to see more compassion, more people stopping and helping the homeless, acknowledging that they are alive and realizing that parting with $1 isn't about the money. It's about helping them push through their own fear of change and enhance compassion in their lives.

And so, I sat with Barret, in the cold, for an hour and a half. We drank hot chocolate and asked for spare change from people. Mostly I just listened and was extremely humbled by the experience of simply sitting and watching my perspective change from being someone who simply walks by to someone who's now an unprivileged pan-handler.

As we were talking, he was telling me about how upset he becomes when people don't acknowledge him or they'll crack up at his funny sign ("Voldermort broke my want.   need $ for a new one") but not leave anything in return.

New York. It's a city of takers, with very few true givers in the bunch. Over an hour and a half he made .70 cents. That's right, CENTS. He said on a good day he'll make between $7 and $11. I was hit so hard by this. How could I not have seen this all these years in New York City?

My meditation practice and gift-economy friends at CharityFocus have changed me forever, for good. I'm seeing things clearer and I'm able to act with compassion in ways that I've never seen before.

As I left, Barret said, "Four of five times in a year, I get a twenty dollar bill and that's amazing!" And with a child-like awe, he added, "I actually have a friend who even got $100 once!!!"   I knew right then that I was going to give him everything I had.

I didn't even count the money in my wallet.   I just gave it all, it was probably more than $200. I didn't miss it. More will come and go in the future, but in that moment, I got to give someone a dream, a little hope and if only for 5 minutes, peace of mind that the world isn't a dark, cynical, selfish place.   Hopefully Barret will continue to explore the space in that window of hope, and I'll continue to do everything I can to help him on his path.

Next up, we're making him a new sign. His idea.

GOOD KARMA AVAILABLE HERE!

95.8K Reads

Posted by Adam
Jan 30, 2008
Comments (198)

Readers Comments

keymaker wrote: What an amazing story! Not many people have the guts to "be the change" to the degree that their heart guides them to, but when we read stories like this, it make us feel that we can do it. Thank you for that. And Barret definitely must have good karma to share, considering that he has friend like you!

marlo wrote: That is great,what a great story!! Didnt you just get a wonderful feeling helping,sharing time with those people? People like you inspire me to do things like that.I believe you have lit a spark that will hopefully turn into a fire!

theresa wrote: what a sad story with a happy ending. i too have given money to people that had less than me. notas much as you gave but enough for them to get a sandwich so they can at least have one meal that day.

Raqui wrote: I like this story, though he must not be trying to hard to make money. Being a former homeless teen I know the money that can be made out there. But some try harder than others. Living in NYC is the strangest place and most often the most interesting people are not the ones we think should be interesting. I think you exploring it is a wonderful thing. Hugs Raqui

lOVEBUG wrote: I have never been to NYC so I can't imagine what the people are like but I know this much, after 911 they did come together, there was alot of need and a lot who gave. Many un-sung hero's just waiting to use their gifts.
Charity focus has helped me a great deal, it does cause me to stop and think. I pray each day and take time to meditate. I have been faithful to this time I spend meditating. What it showed me was ,I praying for eyes like yours. It has also taught me to wait because God will send others who do see and are gracious enough to share their vision. Thank you for being there for me.

Richard wrote: This account of a radical act, your sudden giving of all his money to that homeless man, an act more radical in its way and far more unlikely, it seems, than acts of violence. One can only wonder what the long term effects of such radical acts of compassion might be. I suspect they may linger through entire lifetimes as moments from which some kind of light will always shine.

laurissa wrote: awesome that you have done that and are helping this man in his life journey...

and ultamitely urs

sanserif wrote: Hi Adam! To some parting with money doesn't come easily. Some others do it generously like donating to charity or for some fund-raising event. But it is such random acts of kindness that make a whole world of difference. I read with awe how you started with giving away one dollar and gradually "stepped it up". As you rightly put it, it is not all about the money. It is about reaching out to someone and stopping awhile to listen to them. You are a real hero. Not just to Francine and Baret, but to me as well! I salute you! Keep the karma going. God bless you! And all the best to your acting career. :-)

brighteyes wrote: Your story and actions are impressive...I like that you have and show compassion for the homeless and share and share more....if everyone gave, I bet we could wipe out the homeless.....YOU ARE MY KINDNESS HERO OF THE DAY-great job!

Min wrote: A very perceptive truth. VERY few people realize that the world doesn't revolve around money. The idea that you're giving a sense of hope never comes across most minds. The only thing I'd like to see more of, however, is not just giving the homeless money...but helping them get on track with their lives (even if it takes 1 person at a time). Because then, you know that you're doing more than just feeding them for that one meal. You're actually giving them their lives back. Help 'em find a job, educate 'em, clean 'em up. Then you know that you're truly changing people for the better. Great efforts though, Adam. I hope to see an update in the near future.

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