Where, O Where, Did the Smile Cards Go!?
--by Brian, posted Jun 1, 2008
They went on top of my dresser. About four weeks ago. Some went in the console of my car. A couple were swallowed up in my wallet which I'm quite certain still has my high school ID card. I'm 35.
And there they stayed, all around me yet somehow completely hidden. Which, of course, they weren't. I just wasn't looking. I had forgotten to look. More truthfully, my "looking" had shifted from "how can I help?" to "what do I need?"
I need more money. I need gas for my car. I need a job. I need some clothes. Some new running shoes. I need fulfillment, dammit! O, Happiness, where have you hid? Just when I am most in need, most lost, most miserable, you go and hide, Happiness! How dare you! I NEED these things, material and otherwise and they will deliver unto me joy, freedom, ease and happiness for all my days.
By now you realize, as most of you reading this are like-hearted, what the cause of all my discontent and unsatisfactoriness was, dontcha? Yes, of course. I had stopped reaching for Smile Cards. I had stopped seeing the world as an absurdly, gloriously, abundantly rich playground of giving and instead saw lack. My lack. And, thus, I was unhappy, restless, anxious. Duh. How silly I can be.
So the difference between this morning and now. I found my Smile Cards.
And there is space again. To breathe and play and give. And, before the chorus for Kumbaya kicks in, the needs are all still there. But with plenty of space. Plenty of room to kick and scream and exhaust themselves on their own without me getting to close. And next time I feel myself wanderin' over to say hello to a Need? To shake it's hand, ask it why it's not being fulfilled, feed that Need? I think not. Instead, I'll walk over to my dresser, grab a Smile Card and head out into space. Chances are someone needs it.