I had a dark moment earlier. The dragon that was once me, returned. I hadn't slayed her. Oh she is a fine piece of work. I don't like her at all. But I am grateful she comes out at times. She reminds me of how far I've come and who I don't want to be, ever.
I was at the dentist for my eldest. An appointment which I have organized and reorganized for months. I confirmed it twice and called the day before to ensure all the paperwork would be ready for the x-rays. Then I arrived. it wasn't ready. The lady on had no idea what I was talking about and I immediately felt my blood boil. I was getting so mad. I didn't yell at her or curse but I may as well have because the way I was talking to her was not nice. My tone was so rude, I spoke down to her like she was a child and incapable. It was not a good moment.
The whole time she smiled and was lovely to me. when everything was finally sorted only then was I nice. I sat down in the waiting area and reflected on it all.
How can I make it better I thought? How can I turn this situation? I couldn't. I could gift her a chocolate bar I had on me, but this needed more than that. It needed an honest apology and that is exactly what I gave.
I apologized for the way I had spoken to her and told her it was wrong of me. She accepted. Again with a smile. God help me be that woman. Who smiles and forgives so easily.
I don't get it right every time. I can be rude and when I am, I almost hate myself for it. I am not that person, not anymore. Yet I continue to grow and continue to learn ♥
* photo of actual x-rays of my 9-year-olds teeth.
I was at the dentist for my eldest. An appointment which I have organized and reorganized for months. I confirmed it twice and called the day before to ensure all the paperwork would be ready for the x-rays. Then I arrived. it wasn't ready. The lady on had no idea what I was talking about and I immediately felt my blood boil. I was getting so mad. I didn't yell at her or curse but I may as well have because the way I was talking to her was not nice. My tone was so rude, I spoke down to her like she was a child and incapable. It was not a good moment.
The whole time she smiled and was lovely to me. when everything was finally sorted only then was I nice. I sat down in the waiting area and reflected on it all.
How can I make it better I thought? How can I turn this situation? I couldn't. I could gift her a chocolate bar I had on me, but this needed more than that. It needed an honest apology and that is exactly what I gave.
I apologized for the way I had spoken to her and told her it was wrong of me. She accepted. Again with a smile. God help me be that woman. Who smiles and forgives so easily.
I don't get it right every time. I can be rude and when I am, I almost hate myself for it. I am not that person, not anymore. Yet I continue to grow and continue to learn ♥
* photo of actual x-rays of my 9-year-olds teeth.
2198 Reads
- Posted by brindlegirl
- Aug 21, 2015
- Comments (10)
Readers Comments
FairyBubbles wrote: That was a very interesting story. I like the way you sat and thought about it and then put what you had done wrong - right. If i did that every time i would live a happier life. Thank you for sharing your story and teaching me a better way.
brad2 wrote: This one time (not at band camp), i was volunteering at a bingo hall to raise money, and there was this one lady who was being quite rude to everybody, so, i went up to her, gave her a hug, told her i understood that she was having a bad day, and that i was gonna take her grouchiness away and she was not going to get it back and pretended to put it in my back pocket. So there, i thought. A moment of quiet from her, then laughter, she then gave me hug, thanking me.
slorbach wrote: Have to agree with the comment about the dragon! I know mine still rears its head when i am trying so hard not to let it out. You handled it very well with the apology. I don't know if i could have handled it the same.
kiwicat wrote: God let me be that woman too. It's easy too lose the plot when others don't do what they are supposed to. A heartfelt apology is hard and I'm sure she appreciated it and it was good for your son to see you apologise. You have a good heart don't be too hard on yourself x x x
pluto178 wrote: You got the X ray either way so choose the way of the ? not the dragon what can we choose as the alternative to the dragon I am loving the way you word this that first paragraph was superbly written....... we can learn more from a paragraph like that than a page of others......so glad you don't see much of her these days we all grow this way with age things can only get better.....thats the magic of human growth. So what is the alternative to a dragon........ the fair maiden or perhaps Mother Teresa herself can be the other side of that coin with a Dragon on it. Well done an apology is always wonderful for both giver and receiver. x Now toss that coin in the air and lets hope it lands on the Fair Maiden side........x
melnotes wrote: Wow brindle you did so well for making the effort to apologise, that is awesome of you! Love the X-ray, look at all those teeth waiting to come up! Fascinating!
Mish wrote: Being human, we all have those "blood boiling" moments; I know I do :)). You came back to your light center & spoke from your heart & that is beautiful . You are beautiful x
balou wrote: Love your first paragraph :-) ... This dragon is part of most of us ... and I think she can support us if we allow her to be a part of our lives - and not to shut her out. That she has appeared so rarely to you during the last time does mean you are accepting her for what she is and does ... defending you in moments when you feel helpless, ignored, exploited ... by allowing her to step in far earlier she did not need to become the fire weilding dragon hurting others to prevent you being unheard ...
mindyjourney wrote: To recognize and learn the lesson so quickly, and refocus the direction is a HUGE sign of being exactly the wonderful evolving you, my friend. Well done!
xenahugs wrote: Dear Brindle, there is no perfect. Not one of us is perfect. What's pricelessly important is the awareness we gain and our willingness and action to change behavior. So, that moment wasn't great. What WAS incredible is how you recognized it, thought about how to make it right and had the courage to speak from your heart and apologize. That took guts, Brindle! That took a lot. Kudos for you for going there. I am proud of you and hope that you can recognize how wonderful of a moment that really was. <3
