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Compassion in Action at a Nursing Home

A few years ago, I was working "on loan" to a company grocery store, as they were short-handed during the Christmas Holidays. I was not used to the management nor the clientele at this unit.  As I was checking groceries that morning, an elderly man in a wheelchair came through my checkstand with a basket filled with candy, cigars, and a few trinkets. As I finished ringing up his purchases, I told the man the dollar amount and he presented an out-of-state check from his son. He explained to me that his son had sent him the check for his Christmas present and he wanted to use it to purchase gifts for the friends and wonderful staff at the nursing home located a few blocks behind the store where he resided. Since this was not my "home" store, I needed to have the check approved prior to accepting it. When ... Read Full Story >>

The Little Black Book

I met a work colleague of my husband's a few weeks ago and had forgotten just how hard he was on himself. He thinks he's stupid, ugly, unable to communicate, a bad parent, unable to control his temper and unlikely to amount to anything much in his life.  I found this to be a complete contrast to what I see when I look at him. He's caring, considerate, a good listener, very capable at work and a real family man who will sacrifice anything to give his loved ones the best.  After a few drinks I broached this subject of affirmations and told him I was going to write him a book of inspirational quotes to make him stop in his tracks and see what others see.  So, one long wet winter afternoon I sat with a little black notebook and put what I consider to be an inspiring quote on every ... Read Full Story >>

An Unexpected Thank You from 3 Years Ago

“You probably don’t remember me,” she began, “but I have come back to file for Graduation with Distinction.”  And then she pulled out a piece of paper from her wallet and gave it to me to read.  It was my handwriting, but I didn’t remember writing it.    As the Assistant Director of the Honors Programs at the university, one of my jobs was to review student transcripts to make sure they met requirements for continuing in Honors.  It was not uncommon for freshmen to have a rough start and be notified that they could no longer continue in Honors after their first semester.  Sometimes second trimester report cards would be sent to us anyway, even though students were no longer in the program.   The note she handed me read, “Congratulations on your terrific second semester.  While I know you may have been disappointed from your fall grades, you should feel wonderfully ... Read Full Story >>

Side By Side With A Young Man

I was shopping at the local department store and noticed this young man in his late 20's looking carefully for children's clothing and putting together really cute outfits to buy. This is a small store and when I went to the checkout counters, they were closed and the courtesy desk called me over there to check out. Wouldn't you know the young man was checking out there too. We were Side by Side and I could see and hear his conversation with the cashier.  When the total appeared on the cash register he looked down and said I don't have enough money. He put back a shirt, and he was still short for money. Now, I myself, am not overflowing with money because my hubby is unemployed, but when I saw this guy putting back underwear and socks, I was heartbroken.  Here he was trying to buy some nice clothing and needed items for ... Read Full Story >>

Feeding Stomach and Soul

Over this past weekend, I walked to the local gas station to pick up a couple of things. On my walk home, an older gentleman came up to me and asked if I had any money for him to get something to eat. I told him that I don't carry cash, but if he wanted to follow me, I can get him some food. We walked to my apartment and talked the whole way. He was a veteran from the Vietnam War and recently lost his banking job that he held for over 20 years in banking. He had recently become homeless, and he shared that he has no living relatives left in the area. He felt all alone, with no idea where he was going to sleep tonight. Struck by our conversation, I took a chance and invited him to my apartment.  I introduced him to my roommate and set about ... Read Full Story >>

Next Generation of Kindness

I was with my kids at the grocery store.  They are 3 and 5.

We were doing our grocery shopping, when we saw a 75-80 year old lady in one of those motorized scooters, doing her shopping.  We saw that she was unable to reach something, so I reached it for her and she said, "Thank you."

The old lady also mentioned there were other things she was unable to get because she was confined to her scooter.   So my 5 year old son spontaneously tells her, "Oh, we can help you get the rest of your groceries." 

And we did.  We went through the whole store with her, until she had all that she needed.  When we finished, the woman blessed us and told me that it was nice to see that little ones still have manners. 

As we finished our own grocery shopping, I felt so very proud to know my children will not be selfish people.

A Smile Card Class On The El Train

Yesterday evening I was on the EL train in Chicago. Two men in their early twenties got on and one took the seat next to me. His friend was going to sit in another set of seats. I got up and said, "Oh, here. Take my seat so you can sit with your friend."  When I sat down he said to his friend, "She deserves a hospitality award."    I smiled, turned around and said, "Thank you, but not necessary." To which he replied, "It was cool a thing to do." He seemed so delighted by what to me seemed a rather small gesture.    I sat quietly for a minute and then had a 'BING!" moment. I reached in my wallet and pulled out a Smile card. I turned towards the young man and said, "Here, please pay it forward." He took the card. I turned to face forward in my seat and behind ... Read Full Story >>

On a Kindness Mission with my Smile Cards

My second lot of Smile Cards arrived last week, and I have been trying to think of uses for them. Today, before I headed into town for a job interview, I decided to grab a handful and try to use as many as I could throughout the day.  The weather was awful, it was pouring with rain, and I would've loved to buy umbrellas for people.  But being unemployed, I didn't have the money to spare.  So instead, I decided to think of free or really cheap ways to make people smile -- after all, even the little things count.  I knew I'd also have to deal with my shyness, or just create anonymous acts of kindness, but it was a challenge I was willing to accept! Before leaving my house, I filled a bag with some items that I no longer use and prepared to drop it off at a charity shop in town.  ... Read Full Story >>

An Unexpected Light

"As I waited at a busy intersection in our city  for the red light to change to green,  I glanced left; seeing an elderly man groping about on the curb. He had fallen off of his motorized cart which had lurched a few yards ahead of him, and was crawling off the sidewalk onto the road to pick up his front basket ( which was now in the path of oncoming traffic). Without a second thought, I rushed over to help him to his feet, and although unsteady and shaken, I was able to walk him to his cart, and help him back onto the seat and reattach his basket. As he glanced up at me, he smiled and said, “Thank you.” I made sure that he was OK to continue on and then I returned to my car, which I had left at the intersection. Nobody was honking. They just stared at me. ... Read Full Story >>

True Compassion in the Midst of Fear

Instead of being a day I would like to forget as soon as possible, somehow, today became a day where I experienced the most incredible gesture of compassion that I’m pretty sure I’m going to want to remember for a long time... I live in London and I was on my way to visit my cousins in Wales. I was driving on the motorway at around 70 mph when somehow (probably black ice on the road), I lost control of my car. I was involved in a scary collision with a delivery lorry and then a smaller car. The smaller car had a family in it with three young children.   Through some incredible good luck no one was hurt but the experience was very frightening. There was so much smoke that my first thought was to just get out of my car as fast as I could. I could hear the children from the car behind me screaming and ... Read Full Story >>

Encounter with an Albino Blind Man

Strolling down the streets of New York can be jarring reflection about the state of humanity -- a business man in suit and tie tries to optimize his time by walking and reading newspapers at the time, a thirty-something waitress zips by with her restaurant apron half off and is intently looking at that handheld blackberry; a high school girl is on her cell phone cussing at someone in her Brooklyn accent. Trying to catch my subway train to Penn Station, I felt the New York Minute rush also. Until I notice an albino man ahead of me, walking very purposefully, taking very small, slow, intentional steps. He was blind. For every step he took, he would swing his stick couple of times to get the lay of the land in front of him. I passed him in no time, like everyone else. But then, ... Read Full Story >>

How Heavy Is Your Bag?

One of my teachers had each one of us bring a clear plastic bag and a sack of potatoes.  For every person we’d refuse to forgive in our life, we were told to choose a potato, write on it the name and date, and put it in the plastic bag.  Some of our bags, as you can imagine, were quite heavy.

We were then told to carry this bag with us everywhere for one week, putting it beside our bed at night, on the car seat when driving, next to our desk at work.

The hassle of lugging this around with us made it clear what a weight we were carrying spiritually, and how we had to pay attention to it all the time to not forget, and keep leaving it in embarrassing places.

Naturally, the condition of the potatoes deteriorated to a nasty slime.  This was a great metaphor for the price we pay for keeping our pain and heavy negativity!

Too often we think of forgiveness as a gift to the other person, and while that’s true, it clearly is also a gift for ourselves!

So the next time you decide you can’t forgive someone, ask yourself… Isn’t MY bag heavy enough?

 - from www.pravsworld.com

Power Of A Trashed Pencil

She was a janitor at a school in India.   Her husband died soon after her marriage, she didn't have any family in the area.  She struggled with the responsibility of raising her kids.  For the last twenty years, she's continued to sweep classrooms at local schools. One day, though, she had a radical idea:  I want to give.  It was followed-up by a reasonable yet confusing thought:  But what can I possibly give? When she narrated her desire to a friend, he told her a story.  "Gandhi used to write many letters.  One day, Kakasaheb Kalelkar, a famous Indian author, saw him writing with a tiny pencil and immediately offered Gandhi a bigger pencil from his pocket.  Gandhi politely said that he didn't need it.  The next day, he saw Gandhi scrambling to find his pencil and Kakasaheb again offered him a pencil saying, 'Your pencil was so small anyway.'  Gandhi gently ... Read Full Story >>

A Gesture of Generosity that Healed a Life

I was in church one Sunday when my husband’s ex-wife requested the pastor and the church to pray for her.  She said that she was a drug addict and she wanted to stop using drugs.  She was crying and said that she needed God’s help because she knew that she couldn't do it alone. She was a beautiful woman with four children and they were all crying with her. After church I went to her and introduced myself. She said that she had heard about my marriage to her ex-husband. We talked for a little while and she told me that she did not have a car and that they were going to catch the bus home. I offered to give them a ride and we continued to talk in the car. She began to open up about how bad things really were in her life. I had heard rumours from ... Read Full Story >>

A Priceless Smile From An Old Lady

I was at a busy traffic junction waiting to walk over to the other side when the green lights come on.  There was a family, a man, his wife and an elderly lady, waiting to cross with me. Both the man and his wife were chatting endlessly while the elderly lady was engrossed in staring at a banner with a picture of a child and a mother, which brought tears to her eyes.  Then, the lights finally turned green and all of us rushed to cross the road.  The signal was very short, so the lights changed to red in no time.  I noticed that both the man and his wife had crossed along with me and the elderly lady was left behind.  She seemed to panic as the other two had already crossed and were continuing on without looking back.  I quickly realized what was happening and signaled the ... Read Full Story >>

One Candle at a Time

I've got this friend, Rachel. She's a bit older than me, with a sort of shy, but radiant smile. She's usually tan, as she loves the outdoors and spends as much time outside as possible. No matter the weather. In the winter, she'll often go for walks outside. In the summer, she'll sit in public parks strumming her guitar, reading, or napping on the grass.  She has the leisure to do these things because, suffering from multiple psychological traumas, she is unable to work. Well, unable to work in a "normal" workplace, that is. Because she does work. Her vocation is 'making' candles. She buys ready-made candles, usually the slightly translucent kind where the body of the candle will radiate the light, too. Then she puts designs on them by hand, working for hours at a time in her kitchen. She literally makes hundreds--if not a thousand--of these in a year. And then, ... Read Full Story >>

Cereal For the Soul

A sweet and charming little old lady came up to me at the supermarket about 5 months ago.  She had strict orders from her doctor to avoid artificial ingredients, but she couldn't read the ingredients on the cereal box and was asking me for some help. "No problem," I instantly said.   I picked up the box and indeed, it's a shame that the print was so small that even I had to struggle to read it.  It turned out that it did have artificial ingredients.  With a slightly dejected face, she explained, "I'm struggling to have a decent breakfast in the mornings, because although I love porridge, I don't have enough energy to make it myself.  So I need to find something instant that doesn't have artificial ingredients." Just then, I had an idea.  "Well, I make my own muesli out of natural products and if you could give me you address, I ... Read Full Story >>

Buying a Miracle

A little girl went to her bedroom and pulled a glass jelly jar from its hiding place in the closet. She poured the change out on the floor and counted it carefully. Three times, even. The total had to be exactly perfect. No chance here for mistakes, carefully placing the coins back in the jar and twisting on the cap, she slipped out the back door and made her way 6 blocks to Rexall's Drug Store with the big red Indian Chief sign above the door. She waited patiently for the pharmacist to give her some attention but he was too busy at this moment. Tess twisted her feet to make a scuffing noise. Nothing. She cleared her throat with the most disgusting sound she could muster. No good. Finally she took a quarter from her jar and banged it on the glass counter. That did ... Read Full Story >>

A Lesson In Kindness From My Mom

When I was about twelve, I was headed to a restaurant for dinner with my family. It was winter, and on that particular night, the wind was really blowing. As my mom and I headed towards the restaurant from our car, a girl about my age and her mother came up to us. They asked if we had any spare change. My mom immediately asked where they kept their things. They pointed to an old car in a parking lot across the street. The girl said there were six of them living in that car, which was the same size as my own family. My mom said she had something to do, and after handing the people a few dollars, we said good-bye. Then, my mother sent me inside the restaurant with my dad and my three siblings. But she didn't come. Later, I found out that she had gone home and practically emptied ... Read Full Story >>

Turning Kindness Into A Habit

Last winter I was going through a rough patch in my life.  I had a bunch of terrible things going on around me. I felt very distant and became quite selfish. I hated the way I was feeling and one day I woke up and told myself, “You are above this, stop feeling sorry for yourself.”   Then, I tried out an experiment, and it has DEFINITELY changed me for the better. Every day I would do at least one act of kindness - It could be anything… Bringing the trash down to the trash compactor for my 80 year old neighbor, Going into the store to buy something for myself (like a bit of makeup) and coming out with something for someone else (like candy for my boyfriend) Sitting down with my sister or a friend and just simply listening. And I can ... Read Full Story >>